How to pray as a small group (and how not to)

Almost every small group includes prayer.  Whether it is prayer before a meal,  prayer as an opener or closer, prayer circles, all pray, some pray, or leader prays, the fact is, most groups pray.  Here are a few things to consider when you are looking to add the element of prayer to your small group gathering.

Know your group:  Never assume that everyone in your group is as comfortable praying as you are.  Many people are not comfortable with prayer. Know your group members and avoid putting the person who is uncomfortable or new to prayer in the position where they are forced to pray (especially aloud). 

Stay modern day:  People often change their tone of voice and verbiage when they pray.  Some use Old English or King James language in an effort to express reverence toward God in prayer.  This kind of language change up can be confusing to someone who is new to prayer.  Using new or different "biblical" or uncommon words and phrases in prayer can cause a person who is new to prayer to doubt whether he or she can or should pray.  They begin to think that prayer is reserved for spiritual giants who have a lot of practice and have mastered the use of the right words, phrases or forms and postures for prayer.

Keep it short:  Praying short prayers encourages participation.  Praying short prayers (instead of exhaustive long prayers) will leave room for others to pray about requests that have been made or application points from the material.  Group members who are new to prayer may feel encouraged to pray when they know their small prayer fits in.

Hold Out:  Depending on the type of people you are hosting, you may want to hold out on including prayer (or at least group prayer) as  a part of your first few gatherings.  Holding out on praying together may give your group time to gel in other ways first.  You can use the first two weeks to build anticipation toward the week where you will begin including prayer.

Pre-plan posture:  Think about the poster you will choose and invite people to use when you pray.  Hand holding can be appropriate for a short prayers in unity, but it can be awkward and distracting for group members during extended prayer times.  The same is true for standing or kneeling and the laying on of hands.  There is nothing worse than experiencing sweaty palms or having to break the chain in order to cover a cough, sneeze or scratch an itch.



Change it up:  There are a lot of ways to pray.  For instance, group members may learn to pray using scripture.  Group members can participate in responsive reading prayers.  People may enjoy writing out their prayers to God (possibly allow some members read their written prayers aloud). Leaders can also suggest silent prayer, or paring off into smaller groups of 2 or 3 people.  Be creative but know your audience!

Follow Up:  If requests for prayer are spoken, have someone write them down (possibly even e-mail them out to the group to pray over during the week).  Follow up with the person the next week to see if there have been any outcomes related to the request for prayer.  This not only demonstrates care and concern, it communicates faith, anticipation and expectation that God will respond.  Answered prayer inspires more prayer and results in growing faith.


When and how do you use prayer in your small group?

It Takes All Kinds: interest based small groups

There are many ways to structure a life group ministry within a local church.  Of course, there is no one" right way" to do it and there are pros and cons to every group structure choice.  So, in your endeavor to build a small group ministry structure we recommend you do as the one Alaskan highway road sign wisely states, "Choose your rut carefully, you'll be in it for the next 200 miles."  This is certainly true for establishing a culture of small groups in a church.  Ministry leaders should carefully consider their structure choice as it will be difficult to change it and should be part of your strategic ministry strategy for a long time.

Small group structure choices:
Some churches host home groups as their overall structure for small groups.  Other churches have small groups within classes (often referred to as Adult Bible Fellowship or ABFs).  Many churches offer sermon based small groups or church wide series based small groups.  At our church we have an interest based small group structure which includes all of of these types of groups and more.

Common interest as a starting point:

One of the main pro's to the interest based group structure it that people begin their point of connection through "common interest." For instance, it is easy for a person to join a small group that has basketball as the interest base if they are a person who already enjoys watching and playing basketball.  The same is true for people who enjoy reading books, writing songs, painting pictures, or even studying the Bible.

It takes all kinds:
We have embraced the interest based group structure because we believe hosting many groups of different kinds will help us reach many people who are at various points of connection to the church and faith in Jesus.  Therefore, within our interest based small group structure you will find groups associated with sports, hobbies, fitness, topical studies, book clubs, life situation groups, gender-based groups, ministry / serving-based groups, bible studies, games and more.  Groups form around almost any interest or activity.

4 Elements to consider including:

Because our life groups can form around almost any kind of topic, activity, or interest, we ask that our group leaders plan to include at least one of the four following elements into each of their group gatherings; prayer, scripture, testimonies, worship.

There is a lot of freedom as to how each of these elements will be included and expressed within each interest based life group.  For instance, prayer is included prior to each match at our volleyball life group.  People often share prayer requests or share testimonies of answered prayer from a previous week.  A group may include a time of worship by singing together, while another group simply listens and reads the lyrics to an inspiring song on CD.  There are many ways to include prayer, scripture, testimonies and worship within an interest / activity based group gathering.  The key to blending these elements and activities well is proper planning.  Effective leaders will map out each session and thoughtfully decide when and how to incorporate these important spiritual elements.

If you are a Life Group leader, take some time to map out all of the weeks that you plan on hosting your interest based group.  Create a calendar of weekly gatherings that includes moments for prayer, sharing scripture and testimonies, and worship.  Keep it simple but be creative!

Lead a group:
If you would like to lead an interest based small group at First Assembly Community Ministries, please indicate your interest by writing to Pastor Todd E. Hair or call the Life Groups office at 765-474-1432.


Questions to ask when choosing a small group structure for your church?

1. What is the primary purpose of our small group structure?
2. How long do we expect people to stay in one particular small group?
3. What type of person can lead the small groups we hope to offer?
4. Make a list of the pro's and con's of each small group structure as it relates to the culture of your church and community.

What are some of your thoughts on the different types of small groups?  Which type of group do you enjoy attending or leading?